Thursday, July 24, 2014

#LateNightRambles

First off, I realize, It's not really THAT late. 
But, let's be honest, when I work and get up early, I go to bed by 10 every night. 
So, yes, in my world now, 9:20 is late. 
And yes, this post is not really planned out, so there will be ramblings. 
sorry, not sorry. 

So, today marked my official first day of work for my new career. 
Let me tell you, these past few weeks have been filled with a wide range of emotions leading up to this point. 
These emotions have not been limited to: 
Excitement
Fear
Joy
Anxiety
Gratitude 
anxiety 
Peace

IT's been a crazy journey setting up my classroom, thinking of ideas for meet the teacher night and the first week of school, thinking about my students and what kind of teacher I will be, and mentally preparing myself for this big day in which I officially start my journey as a new teacher. 

I have to admit, there have been a few times when I stopped and thought,
"Is this right in my life? Is this really where i am supposed to be?"

Side note: It is not uncommon for me to have this thought during times of big change. 
A lot of times having this thought scares me a bit though because it causes for great reflection and often times many changes that I did not expect, as I realize Heavenly Father has a different plan for me. 
So as I had this thought this past week, my mind flashed back to those instances: a broken off engagement, deciding not to go on a mission, deciding to be a teacher, ending up in graduate school, and moving to various places.  
In each of these instances,  I felt like I was striving to do good things, and then realized there needed to be changes in my plan. And each time, through all the stress and anxiety of the decision making process, I was able to see a greater vision of Heavenly Father's plan for me. 

Anyway, I digress. As you can imagine, as I've been reflecting on where I am at in my life, and having all these past instances come to mind, I have been feeling a little anxious that there might need to be some major changes in my life. 
However, it was amazing to feel all of those anxieties be ceased today. 

As I was sitting in my teacher training, in a room filled with brand new teachers, I felt this great peace in knowing this is exactly where I am supposed to be in life. 
as the presenters gave information about this coming up year, and gave advice to all of us first year teachers, all of my anxieties turned to peace and excitement. 
I feel like I was rejuvenated with this passion and excitement for my career ahead of me: something I lost sight of during the stress of prepping my classroom and preparing my meetings. 

It excites me to know that I am in a career that is dedicated to helping mold the lives of young children. 
Yes, that is a somewhat scary thought. 
But, it is also motivating to me to be the best I can be. Not only for myself, but to help my students. 
As I was sitting in these meetings, I thought back to the tender moments I had student teaching, and being a long-term substitute, and it filled me with excitement to know that I can have those experiences each day of my career. 
That is amazing! 

All in all, it just feels good to know that I am where I am supposed to be in life, and doing what I am supposed to do. I heard in a talk once, by John Bytheway that Heavenly Father wants us to make decisions in our life. 
Often times in this decision making process, He will tell us no when there is a better plan for us, and let us keep going if we are heading on the right track. 
I honestly don't know why my life has been filled with so many "no's," but I am grateful to feel that this next chapter in my life is marked with a big, 
"YES!"

I can honestly say Life is good. 
I am excited for this new, exciting chapter of my life! 

1 comment:

  1. Most days will be challenging, some students will require more attention than others and there is never enough time in the day.
    Your students will always remember the difference you made in their life. You'll love every day.
    Congrats and best wishes, I am proud of you
    uncle Carl

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